FNH

The Fiver | Bad news for those footballers who had got the nail clippers out

03-Aug-2021 15:39:22 | The Guardian

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Random acts of largesse always go down famously at Fiver Towers. There’s nobody to bring round a gigantic box of Krispy Kremes now we’re all WFH, and we’re all the poorer for it. Fortunately, referees’ head honcho Mike Riley has come up with a generous flourish that makes raspberry ripple and mint choc chip seem utterly bland. “Effectively what we have given back to the game is 20 goals that were disallowed last season by using quite forensic scrutiny,” he parped, explaining cunning tweaks to the VAR system adored by people who don’t actually like football. “It’s the toenails, the noses of the players that last season were offside – this season they will be onside.”